The (R)Age of Reason

If we don’t understand how
our minds work,
we will begin to rely

on our mental constructions
and we will be at the mercy of reason.
Anthony De Mello

If stress has a flag-bearer, then that title has to go to the mother of all emotions, anger. We live in a culture where anger is all the rage. From politicians to talk show hosts, little league coaches to more talk show hosts, it seems everyone has a river of anger flowing in their veins. Anger and stress are not just two sides of the same coin they are the same side of the same coin and that coin has long since tarnished.

If we are honest with ourselves, we have to admit that while we may long for emotions such as happiness, love and peace, anger is our go-to emotion. Anger seems to flow so effortlessly and, if the truth were told, feels so good at times. While there are many theories behind our attraction to, and use of, anger, we can boil most of them down to the following: the ego hates not having its needs met. Look at any situation that brings an angry response and see if you can’t sense the presence of the egoic mind which is ticking off all of the rational reasons why such and such should not be happening.

This is why the anger habit is so hard to break; it makes sense to the mind. The mind compares what is happening against what it wants to happen and then sends signals to the body that something is wrong. This can actually be beneficial when our personal rights are being trampled on. Many great changes in our lives have anger-energy as their fuel. The problem arises when the threat only exists in the mind. In a dramatic case of the dog chasing its tail, our minds create scenarios that get the blood boiling and then they try to find ways to calm the raging beast. This not-so-merry-go-round is what many of us mistake for “just another day” until vertigo leaves us feeling exhausted physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

When we move into a more mindful state, we see that it is our “reasonable” minds that are behind the rage response. When we begin to accept things as they are, the world no longer seems like it is here just to frustrate us. Yes, we still get angry, but we know that the anger is the body alerting us to the fact that we have slipped out of present moment awareness. We know that we are not our anger and that when we are no longer interested in it, the energy moves on.

The Buddha said that hanging on to anger is like holding a hot coal with the intention of throwing it at someone. In the end, only we are burned by it. Think of this image the next time you feel your mind getting ready to put together the list of “things to be angry about today.” I’m certain that you will realize that the wise response is to drop the coal.